About Those Diabetes...

Seeing double, and more from this freshly-diagnosed Substack writer

Diabetes isn’t a death sentence but in the past 10 days my life has completely turned upside down.

Side note: Is diabetes a plural word? Is it “those diabetes” or “that diabetes”? 🤷🏼‍♂️🤔

It may as well be plural because I’m seeing double.

Last night I was drinking a tall glass of water…

When I was about halfway done with the 20oz glass, I went to put it down on the table and SMASH!!!

Water everywhere, and shattered glass all over the place.

Turns out the table was about four inches higher than I thought it was.

“Well that was awkward.”

Actually awkward is an understatement.

I was pissed.

Annoyed AF

(for future reference: AF = “as fuck”)

Sad, feeling sorry for myself, worried this might never go away or even get worse.

Anxiety… (the proverbial uninvited guest who stays too long)

How to clean up spilled water and shattered glass in poor lighting with double vision

• About a half roll of paper towels

• 5 or 6 swiffer pads

• Broom and dustpan

• Paper grocery bag (double is better)

• A very bright flashlight

• An eye patch

I’m probably leaving something out.

Oh yeah: Wear shoes.

I won’t bore you with the step-by-step. Got’ir done.

Prick me once, prick me twice…

The blood test machines are actually pretty cool, and the lancets for pricking your fingers have a little dial on them 1-5 depending how deep you want to puncture.

Everything annoys me right now though. I don’t like having to do this. And I don’t want to look at the bright side right now.

Fuck the bright side.

(Just being honest).

I pray to God for grace and forgiveness continually as I have these thoughts.

I know it’s just self generated drama.

“This too shall pass” as the saying goes.

Besides, it’s type 2 diabetes, my dad (RIP) was diabetic, and I should have been more mindful over the years with my diet and sugar and carbs consumption.

So it’s basically my fault.

That means each finger prick and every annoyance is penance.

Penance, and motivation to change.

That double vision though…

Doc says there’s a honeymoon period with the onset of double vision and a fresh diagnosis of diabetes.

Blood sugar levels are supposed to be under 100.

The other day at the ER my blood sugar clocked in at 519.

Those numbers were elevated from over indulgence on Thanksgiving weekend with sugary and starchy foods, but my “fasting blood sugar” (the first test of the morning after sleeping aka fasting for the night while sleeping) is still in the 280+ range.

Doc tells me if I can get my blood sugar levels down under 150 then my eyes should self correct…

But if I don’t, and the blood sugar levels stay high, there’s a good chance of the eye problems further developing into permanent eye damage.

Irreversible in other words.

This is some serious shit.

My sugar levels have not come down even with several days on insulin.

Spoke with the doctor this morning and he gave me a new treatment protocol to try over the next several days… it involves twice daily blood sugar testing, upping my slow acting insulin dosage, and then adjusting that dosage after every three days according to the blood sugar levels.

He also took me off the oral medication (Metaformin) and prescribed a different type of insulin (fast acting, small doses) to supplement the slow acting insulin, and to use that as needed up to twice daily.

So from zero pin pricks to 2+ per day and 1-3 injections daily.

For someone who doesn’t like even taking any oral meds, 2-5 skin punctures per day is, let’s just say, ANNOYING AF.

The Rx Metaformin…

Took this for 2 days and begged my doc to approve my decision to stop taking it today.

He said yes.

Longer story there but my body rejected it full stop.

I’m going to go pick up my fast acting insulin right now.

In conclusion….

It’s not at all my intention to blog about every up and down with the diabetes, but the freshness of it all has so invaded my lifestyle and other recent plans, that it seemed dishonest not to talk about it here.

So there you have it.

Thank you to all who have emailed and texted me to see how I’m doing.

I really appreciate your caring and emotional support.

Also…

Welcome new paid subscribers!

Oh, I’ve noticed you first couple paid subscribers signing up and I love you.

This is where the rubber meets the road.

Your signups are the best indicators that I am on the right path with this Substack and my podcast.

As soon as I can, I’ll start creating special content for paid subscribers only…. or figuring out which posts I can create exclusive access paywalls for (usually for a week).

Life goes on with diabetes. Many have it worse than I.

Oh shit though… there I go looking on the bright side.

God bless!